I know this is hard to comprehend if you have not done a lot of healing for yourself. But for myself I know this to be true. What led up to this information is, as always to ask and then be open to receive. I have started to see someone and before he left a few nights ago, he said “I have worked very hard to be in this body and stay connected” (more or less his words). My belief is slightly different, but it did cause me to think about what he said. I asked Holy Spirit to help me understand what that meant. Ask and you shall receive….
Well, it happened again, another message about “What if, what I thought was true, Wasn’t?” I was sleeping when I was awakened with, ” It Never Happened.” This time I felt freedom and joy in the knowledge that it was true. It never happened…no hurt, no abandonment, no taking of the joy and innocence I had as a child.
The experiences that I thought happened, so convinced that it did happen, caused me to shut down and close off my heart…to myself and everyone. I left the body. I stayed close enough to feel anger, hurt, disappointment, resentment and blame upon others. I left joy, love, abundance, peace, and forgiveness behind. I let anger rule me, it gave me security in the fact that I was not going to let anything or anyone hurt me again. I became sarcastic, arrogant and self-righteous. All of which I see as Ego leading me to self – destruction.
Then one day I found my then 14 year old Drunk and my 16 year old asking me to get his younger brother because he was “sick”… not drunk. I went to get him and he was pucking his guts up. I got him home and then went into my room and just started to cry for the first time in a very, very long time. I left their father because he was an alcoholic. I saw crying as a weakness because that’s all my older sister did. But I could not stop myself.
Then when I was calm I said to God, I need help, I cannot do this by myself. Please help me. From that moment on, I received the assistance I needed. I met a friend from high school after 20 years. I knew that what I wanted was Inner Peace above all else. When we believe we have been hurt or hurt others we become guilty, sinful even, because that is what we are taught in religion. We are born of sin. I no longer believe this to be true. I was hurt as a child but is it true? What is the real lesson here? The lesson is that we are all God’s children and we have free will so we can chose to believe we are sinners or we can belive that we are innocent, I for one believe that we are sinless, always in God’s embrace. So, What if what I thought was true wasn’t, then where does that leave me? What happen in my “supposed” childhood didn’t happen, then what? Well the answer came… It never happened. So what do I do with information?
I choose happiness, love, joy and peace, in the knowledge that I am one with my creator, Innocent. By forgiving I have set myself free.
It never happen!!!