I find that when you keep yourself so busy and then you want to be in a relationship, it makes it hard for the other person. If you choose to be in that relationship you better plan on having a lot of patience. Even when you know the person really does want to hang with you, but “something” always has to be done, errands to run or having to fix something, can be frustrating. I believe and I could be wrong that busy all the time is about fear. Can’t get too close, afraid of being hurt. But sometimes they don’t realize that “they” are actually hurting the relationship and not the other person. Thinking that the person wants to manipulate their time but that is exactly what they are doing. Then wonder why the relationship doesn’t work. In a relationship one does not want to feel 2nd best to other “stuff.” This is not about someone else and you. So you need to see it first and foremost and then make a clear decision if you want to be in this type of relationship. You can choose again if you just can’t handle it.
The person cares, has read a lot of books on relationships and is still not getting it, that it is on their terms when it comes to where, when or if? Since I know he is leaving to go to another state in a week or so, I have to decided to go with the flow of this relationship. Not everybody can handle this. I can, only because he communicates with me everyday and we do really care for each other. Also, he has been open and honest since the beginning. Since I know it is of a temporary nature it does make it easier. I also know that right now, I need this. I have chosen to enjoy my time with him and have no desire to change him. I will admit that sometimes it is frustrating.
I feel good and smile when I am around him. I also know that he is not trying to hurt me.
Hopefully, he will see himself and let go of past pain and for myself as well.
For me, he has helped me to open my heart more, to enjoy the person without expectation or the desire to change him.
This is another test. As always we can choose to learn or not. My choice is to enjoy the time we have together and I can change my mind anytime when it does not serve me or him. Any relationship has it’s challenges whether it be personal or business. Maybe you are in this relationship to learn to speak up for yourself or to let go of control or to open your heart, whatever it is, you both made a decision to be in it, so be in it and learn from it. Learn who you are, what you want, do not blame them if you are not clear and they can’t give you what you want. It always take two. If you are going to be in a committed relationship, I have news for you, it is 100% from both not 50-50%.
With respect for all relationships and with Love, Angelina